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Tips to Avoid these Divorce Mistakes

Avoid these divorce mistakes that you didn’t even know you were making.  Divorce is a challenge in lots of ways.  Don’t make it harder than it already is. 

1 – Communication

            Divorce can move you into areas of your life that you didn’t know about before, didn’t want to know about and some day you don’t want to even think about it.  Your lawyer understands that.  However, you aren’t saving money when you ignore your lawyer and their staff.  If your lawyer’s office needs you to respond to something, it is always best to do it in the most efficient way.   If you don’t reply to the email or return the call they will probably keep trying to get ahold of you.  More time and effort to get you to answer something or send something that your lawyer needs will just increase your fees.  The most efficient way is to respond quickly, accurately and completely.

2-Quality of Life

            Making life miserable for your soon to be ex-spouse is a big mistake.  By making life hard for your spouse you are possibly creating issues for further litigation and possibly ending any goodwill or negotiation that you are working on.  And, if your spouse is also the parent of your kids you’re making life hard on your kids, too.  Also, if you can, don’t join the argument, if your almost ex-spouse is looking to get you to fight. 

Kids are smart. 

Kids watch when you don’t think they are and they learn from what they see their parents do.

3 – Support=Friends, Family, Groups

            Call your friends when you need to vent.  Call your best friend to go out and talk about the really bad days.  Find a good divorce support group.

            Don’t call your lawyer when you just need to vent.  Remember to call your lawyer when you need to because of an issue in your case but not when it is only for support.  It happens sometimes, but it is always best to get support from those who know you best.  Lawyers are trained to look at your divorce from the legal perspective, work on solutions, and see issues and sometimes you need a different kind of support – the kind that can only come from friends and family.

Jill O’Connell is a straight-forward family law and divorce attorney who can be reached at 940-497-5454.