Holiday Guide for Divorce
This is my updated holiday guide for parents going through divorce during the holidays and parents recently divorced before the holidays. I’ve posted tips and suggestions for the holidays over the years, and you can find those in my earlier blog posts. 2020 is a year with many changes, and the holidays are going to experience differences as well.
Focus on Your Kids this Year
The first Christmas after divorce will be different. But, different doesn’t need to be bad. Focusing on your kids will increase your enjoyment of the season. One of our family’s favorite memories is driving around and singing in the car when my son was a little guy many, many years ago.
Kids naturally see the excitement and magic in the holiday seasons, and maybe this is the year for you to enjoy some of those same types of moments, too. As parents we’ve all had those Decembers that fly by because of all the activities, parties, and school performances that our kids are required to attend. They are fun and festive but seem to take up so many evenings the month flies by. This year, as parents, we won’t have the usual holiday required greetings and appearances, so take advantage of 2020 and use the time to have a little fun! Go drive around and look at lights. Or drive through a Starbucks and get some coffee and hot chocolate and sing Christmas carols. Those kinds of times make great memories.
Help Your Kids Buy Gifts
This one may seem obvious but bear with me. Help your child or children buy gifts for your ex. Even if you’d described your relationship with your ex as rough, put that aside and buy some gifts. You probably know a few things about your ex that may help your child pick out a gift or gifts for their other parent. You may even have to crack open your wallet or use a little plastic to help purchase the gifts. It will be worth it. You know how happy your kiddo or kiddos get when they have a gift they are sure their mom or dad is going to love! The joy in their face as they anticipate their mom or dad opening the gift is worth a million dollars. And, that’s probably your goal at the end of it all anyway. You’ll be giving your child the best gift!
Start Planning Your Holiday Plans Now
If you start to plan some fun and activities now, there will be some benefits for you and your kids.
You’ll have something to look forward to as you go through next month.
Your kids know things are going to be different this year. And, let’s be honest things are different everywhere in 2020, so go ahead and plan some fun and activities.
I’ve worked with and represented many parents over the last two decades. My experience has shown me over the years, that one universal thing no parent looks forward to is the year they don’t have their kids for the special holiday. However, I’ve also gotten to hear the great stories and experiences from the parents who plan to have some special activities and fun with their kids regardless of when their time is spent with the kids have the better holidays, regardless of where their kids were on Christmas Day. The parent who focuses on what they have and not on what they don’t have is the one who has a wonderful holiday season.
To sum it up, my best tips for divorced parents at the holidays are make your plans early, and focus on your kids.
For more tips and advice specific to your case, call and get your divorce coaching session or consultation scheduled with me, 972-203-6644.